The Aarons and Miriams of Ministry

In numbers 12 we come to a peculiar account. One that I actually have never heard anyone speak on nor have I read anything written about this account. Never the less I was compelled (albeit rather "randomly") to read this account and it really struck me how many similarities there are for those of us who serve in full time vocational ministry (Pastors and Missionaries and their wives) and for those who serve along side as lay people within the church. So here we go...

The first thing this passage states is that Aaron and Miriam spoke against their brother Moses because he had taken a Cushite as a wife. 

People are always very quick to judge the decisions that people of ministry (this includes pastors and missionaries and their families) make. The cars they buy, the kinds of clothes they wear, how many children they have, how they operate and do things, how they part their hair (sounds ridiculous but I’m sure it happens) the list could go on and on. You make a decision, chances are there will be several and often differing opinions of that said decision.

Moses married a Cushite. Was this a sin? I do not know, all I know is God never called him out for it, but He most certainly called Aaron and Miriam out for speaking against him for it. 

For those in or about to enter ministry, know this: people will always have an opinion about you and what you do and pretty much everything about you...but in the end only...ONLY God’s opinion truly matters! Cling to that! May God Be BIG and people be small. People pleasing is only good if it comes as a byproduct of God pleasing. So set your aim high!  Guard yourself against making decisions only in light of what others may think of you, make decisions in light of what God thinks of you. There will be opinionated Aaron’s and Miriam’s of ministry in your ministry journey, do not allow them to bring you down, focus on the Lord. 

The second thing this passsage states is that Aaron and Miriam felt like they were going unnoticed. This little brother of theirs who hadn’t even grown up with them or felt the sting of slavery but enjoyed the luxury of the palace, was somehow now a leader of their people. He got all the lime light. All the glory. It says they stated “has the Lord only spoken through Moses, has He not also spoken through us.” They had fallen into the deadly trap of making their ministry of prophesying into a territorial struggle. 

Most know that I love to run. On my running route every year from the very start of spring till very late summer I have an arch nemesis that often distracts me. It is a tiny little insignificant red winged black bird. How I hate those things. They are so very territorial, and with good reason, they have babies to protect. They like to fly right above me and squawk and whistle. I’m always fearful that they will swoop at my head but thankfully they usually do not. 

They do not physically hurt me but oh how they distract me from running my race. They are so loud and right there, throwing all kinds of bird threats. 

In ministry you will have red winged black birds. They have a special gift almost a knack for their ministry that they have. Maybe they are youth leaders, pianists, maybe they run the kids program, maybe they lead a ladies group or choir. Whatever it is, they do a wonderful job at it and receive praise for it. And in some respects, rightly so. However, we are all (every single one of us) susceptible to building a nest around the ministries we are involved in and we make them our babies. 

We think we have a handle on that ministry and no one else could possibly help or do better or have any kind of advice on how to do it better because we are already “doing it better”. We become a red winged black bird. Does that red winged black bird actually own that spot on the road? He has his nest there and his young. Surely this means he owns it right? We would all say emphatically “no he doesn’t own it. “ It is technically a ditch so the county owns it but more importantly God ultimately owns it.

So too, we don’t “own” any ministries either. I have the privilege to write up the minutes for our women’s missionary fellowship of our church. I submit them to the newspaper and record them in a book to be read each month at our meetings. I love to write and so I was so thankful for an opportunity to do this within a church ministry capacity. I can do what I love to do for the church of God. What an awesome privilege. But it is just that: a privilege. I became the secretary of WMF our second year of being here as pastor and wife. I loved it so much and when the next year came around for my position to be voted upon I figured I would be a shoe in. But I wasn’t, and that stung at first. But God used that to open my eyes to what this writing position had become.

I had made it my baby, built a nest around it on territory that did not even belong to me. And I squawked at passers by. That humbled me. To see what I had become, what my wicked heart could make ministry for God to be: completely about self.

So if you are in ministry or about to go into it, know that there will be red winged black birds in your ministry, and you need to be on guard yourself as this can happen to literally anyone! Don’t be fooled! We do not own any ministry. They all belong to God, in fact the natural gifts and abilities that we have to do any said ministry belong to and come from God. Ministries of any kind cannot and should not ever become our “babies”. Should never become a time for us to shine, but rather may they be something for God to shine through. Remember, if you receive praise from men on earth that is your reward and you are missing out on a better reward: praise form God in Heaven. Do not allow the squawking to distract you, keep running. The black birds do not own the ditches or the road I run on. They can squawk all they want but I’m still gonna run. You do the same. Keep running and pay them no heed other than to pray for them and to if given the chance, gently correct them and pray they come to the knowledge of the truth and to true repentance.

Another thing  to note in this passage is how close these two were in proximity to Moses. They were his siblings. His brother and sister. Sometimes those who will attack you in ministry will be close to you. May even be some of your best friends. In fact all of them, as long as they know Christ as their Savior, are your brothers and sisters. Always remember that. These are your family and you have the same Father. Christ died for their sin against you as much as He did for yours against Himself. Remember the grace that has been shown you by God for Christ’s sake and reflect that to others. The cost will be high, the higher road is never the easy one, but it is the one that leads to life. Our goal should always be for peace and we should do everything in our hand to make for peace. Keep in mind always that your battle is not with "flesh and blood" it is not with these brothers and sisters in Christ, rather it is with much darker things (Eph. 6). 

The final thing I noticed was what God states about Moses in this passage: "Now Moses was a very humble man, more humble than anyone else on the face of the earth." WOW! What a thing to be said of a person! This little thing called humility is key. How should we respond to the Aarons and Miriams of ministry that we will face? With humility. Remembering the very example of our High King Jesus: 

"fixing our eyes on Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith, who for the joy that was set before Him, endured the cross, despising the shame and is sat down at the right hand of God the Father. Consider Him Who endured such opposition from sinners, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart." Hebrews 12:2-3

Did you catch that? Jesus suffered opposition from sinners, and He is our example. How did He handle that? "Like a sheep to the slaughter, He opened not His mouth." Let God be your protection. Anything we face as far as opposition goes could never come close to what Christ faced. Let that sink in and make it "so that you will not grow weary and lose heart." Fix your eyes on Jesus.

So remember, there will be Aaron and Miriam’s of ministry in your ministry journey. They will have opinions but only God’s opinion truly matters in the end. They may have ministries that they have made their babies, but don’t allow their squawking to distract you, keep running the race looking to Jesus. Remember that they are your brother, your sister in Christ. Have grace, always be kind, and forgive as God in Christ has forgiven you. Finally, remember to look to your example Jesus and follow His ways of humility and grace no matter the cost.

Pain: the unforgiving road

Pain. It comes in lots of shapes and forms and from different hands. It is a wearisome journey, an unforgiving road. They say it will bring either the best or the worst out in those within your realm of contact. If you’ve been down this road of pain,  you know that how people respond to the pain of others comes in all stripes and colors. 

Sometimes it comes as silence. They say nothing. They see you’re hurting, but don’t stop. Much like the Priest and The Levite  who passed by the Jew who had been attacked on the road in the parable of the Good Samaritan. 

Sometimes they speak and you wish they hadn’t .They  say nice sounding cliches:

“Well at least you don’t/didn’t (fill in the blank).

“Just focus on God right now/cling to Jesus”

“It will get better, you’ll see” 

They see your pain and even go a step further and acknowledge the pain, but what they offer is just a warm well wish (“be warm and filled”) when instead you need to be brought into their home and offered food and rest (a hug, a meal, a listening ear, a gift of some kind to brighten your spirit. Something tangible etc.) They want to do something for you but do not want to pay too high a price while helping you so they throw some good “Christian” phraseology around and pat you on the back and send you on your way.

What they do not realize is how empty that leaves you, how cold and heartless those well meaning phrases really are. How guilt tripping these kind of phrases can be to a person. 

Sometimes people compare their pain to yours. Much like children comparing scrapes from falling off their bikes. Their only goal is to one up you. “Well you think you have it hard....” or “I went through (fill in the blank)”

Pain is NOT nor should it ever be a

Competition.

Some discredit certain trials because they don’t quite hit the level of pain they feel is a prerequisite for something to be called a “trial” or “pain”.

Nothing like someone saying “you’re just imagining all of this”

I lost my baby at 4-5 weeks. Some would consider this to be a “chemical pregnancy”. I consider it a life lost. I don’t believe in “chemical pregnancies. I liken that phraseology to the demonic work of calling a baby an “embryo”.  The latter makes it ok to abort a baby, the other makes a death of a baby seem like nothing at all.

Some want to call it imagined pain.

Finally, some put their time line upon your pain. “She still isn’t over this yet?” Most likely they wouldn’t say this directly to your face. But you pick up on it in their subtle ways. 

Listen, grief looks different from person to person. There is no time line to grief. And the other thing about grief is that it isn’t a time line at all. It is who you are. It becomes a part of you. Always there on the back burner and brought forward to the front by dates, smells, seasons, weather, something someone says in passing. Clothes. Toys. Smells and sights that whir you back in time, bringing with them all the emotions, dreams lost and sinking heart feelings. Grief is now like the watch on your wrist or the ring on your finger. You don’t always notice it is there but it is always there. Yet, it is different than your watch or ring, because you can’t ever take it off like you can a watch or ring, so don’t let anyone ever make you think you can!

So what do we do when these things happen? When people respond in these less than stellar ways to our pain..

We give grace to those who respond in these ways. It will take every ounce of our being and the power of the Holy Spirit to respond in the midst of our pain in this way of grace. I liken it to facing a storm on a ship at sea while a mutiny is going on. Seems impossible, the odds are against us, we want to just give up and give in. We are fighting something without and  within. We are tempted to think “If we cant  beat em, join em”. The struggle to throw words back is real. But grace must win the day.

So we must GIVE grace, but we also must BE grace. When others are walking through pain, be grace to them. Don’t do any of the above I’ve mentioned. Be grace to someone. Paul almost always opened and closed his letters with “the grace of God Be with you all” 

I think that has a two way meaning. May God’s grace be upon you, but may it also shine through you to others. 

So do you know anyone walking through pain right now? Pain is a rough journey, an unforgiving road, so be the grace along the way. My counseling professor said to treat all pain as if it is real, because to them it is real.

Show grace, take a meal, watch their kids, send a package, or a gift of some sort. 

Above all, be there with them, listen to them and pray with and for them. These are key. 

“May the grace of God Be with you all”