He has dealt Bountifully with me!

I’m just blown away with how good God is! Often I think to myself "I just cannot believe God did this for us! Leading us as He has, providing for us as He has, giving us Miriam as He has, giving us such loving ad God fearing parents as He has, giving us such an amazing and humble, loving, godly, growing group of people we get to call "church family"...for the trials He has given us to make us more like Himself.. But most of all for sending His Son Jesus Christ to die and rise again so that we can be free from sin and death! And all this is just the tip of the iceberg!

 Im just bragging on my awesome, loving, all powerful, incomprehensible, immutable, merciful and gracious and sovereign God today! Ps. 13:6  I will sing unto the Lord, because he hath dealt bountifully with me. “We recently celebrated Christmas with the Duffy side for the 2014.

 You see the Duffy 2014 Christmas celebration was supposed to take place in July...but instead of celebrating Christ's birth, we had grandpa Duffy's funeral. Oh the irony! The very day we planned to get together to celebrate Christmas, was in fact the very day we celebrated Grandpa’s promotion to heaven and layed him to rest! Man plans his way, but God orders his steps! How Im finding that more and more true the further and further I go in this life!

 At this recent Christmas gathering, we all felt that empty place…we all saw the empty chair...we all felt a sting as my dad read the Christmas story in Grandpa’s stead. We all carried on, laughing and joking like we always do, but from time to time it would hit us, that Grandpa was gone. This Christmas, and every one after would never be the same.  But probably the one hurting most that day was my grandmother. Here she was trying to celebrate...trying to laugh and be quote on quote "normal", when in her heart are pangs of the pain of losing her husband just six short months ago. 

Grandpa was always a quiet man, so one might think his lack of presence wouldn’t even affect us. But I tell you, one doesn’t have to be loud and talk a lot to be missed. His gentle, quiet and humble spirit was missed. His prayer that always contained the whole of the gospel for all to hear was missed.

We talked…we ate…we fellowshipped together and caught up with one another. But soon the time came to open gifts. We all got quiet as Grandma began to speak. She had just finished walking around our ever growing circle, handing out envelopes to each member as she went. With tears in her eyes, she started to speak but then lost it completely. Many of us (me included) had to swallow back the lumps in our own throats.  We waited for her to gain her composure. When she did, it blew me away what this God-fearing woman I get the privilege to call “Grandma” had done. She told us that she had thought there wouldn’t be enough money for Christmas this year (last year rather…remember what I told you earlier? Just checking lol). But she purposed in her heart and worked hard and earned enough to give all of us a gift of money. That was what was in these envelopes. But she didn’t stop there, I mean that in and of itself was baffling…and humbling to me. She went on to say that she has a hard time sleeping sometimes. Which isn’t hard to imagine, I have a difficult time sleeping when my hubby is gone only for a nite or two…her other side of the bed is empty till God calls her home. She has no hope of Grandpa returning home.

 On her sleepless nights she used her time to look up verses for every single person! Every daughter and son of her’s….plus all her grandchildren and even the three great grandkids! And I can speak for Josh and myself she wrote two references!

With tears in her eyes and barely choking the words out, she said the following “I’ve prayed about each of you and I found passages that I thought would be especially encouraging and helpful to each of you. ”  Then in a more pleading voice with her usual hint of sternness she urged us to look them up, and take them to heart.

WOW! Not only has this woman gone to the extra work of earning money for each of us, but she spent many a sleepless night in God’s Word, praying for her family…and asking for passages that God would use in our lives! She was caring for the physical but more important the spiritual needs of her children..grandchildren…and great grandchildren!

What a selfless and loving God-fearing woman!

When I returned home, in the quietness I managed to find during Miriam’s nap, I looked up the verses and pondered them. The first passage, was Col. 3:16-17, and the second was Ps. 13:6. HOW FITTING for MY LIFE! Honestly! The Spirit of God must have been working overtime in and through my Grandma as she prayed over all of us and wrote down the verses!

Firstly, these verses speak of singing praise to God. Which, my grandma knows I LOVE to sing! As she wrote these references down I’m certain her mind went to the times when I was little, when I would DAILY (weather permitting) go swing and sing…and also to the times I sang with my dad…and at my sister’s wedding and my own. I sing all the time (ask Josh and Miriam…to their peril! Lol).

Secondly, these verses speak of the reason for singing and to Whom I’m to sing about and for! God and His Son Jesus Christ!  Ps. 13:6 specifically says “For dealing bountifully with me.”

If no one else, my parents and grandparents can speak to how bountifully God has dealt with me! Despite my shortcomings, my eating disorder…wrong dating choice in highschool…my refusal to marry...etc. Despite my trying to run from God and His plans for my life, I mean let’s face it, I used to hate Josh and I vowed never to marry him…God must laugh! I also refused to marry at one time in my life, so much for following the call to full time ministry I received at a very young age while listening to Patch the Pirate goes to the jungle. I was running from God and fast!

But He got a hold of my heart EACH and EVERY time I wandered! He got a hold of my heart before it was too late! If it were not for God I honestly probably would not even be alive! For a lot of reasons, but mainly because I was stubborn and bull-headed (I’m especially thinking of my eating disorder here…I was literally pounds away from death when I was 16 and 17 years old! Pounds!).

BUT GOD! HE TRULY HAS DEALT BOUNTIFULLY WITH ME! Allowing me to break free from the chains of my eating disorder… to see the wrong in the guy I dated and to break free from the chains of that suffocating relationship…to allowing me to see that not all guys are bad and to embrace the forgiveness I have in Christ and live in that freedom! For allowing me to find a loving and good husband in Josh…to allowing me to go into ministry and fulfill my childhood dreams of being a Pastor’s wife and living out in the country! To entrusting me with a little soul, when I really deserved infertility (which is what many women who had eating disorders in their past face).

Grandma knows and has seen that God has dealt bountifully with me! She saw how God could take a rebellious, stubborn and strong willed child…teen… and young woman, melt her heart and turn her towards Himself and His saving Grace and mercy through Christ’s death and resurrection. Empowering her to face and conquer even her greatest foes.

Grandma’s verses are now my life verses! They describe me, give me direction and helped me to see God and His goodness in my life! How BIG and GREAT a God we serve!

Lastly, the Col. 3:17 specifically speaks to doing ALL for God’s glory. Grandma may not know it, but the Holy Spirit working in her does know that I struggle with doing things for my glory and the praise of others. He knows I am a people pleaser…He knows my struggles and knows I need this reminder!

I’m so thankful for how BOUNTIFULLY my God has dealt with me in SO many countless ways! One being working through my Grandma!  She took her tears…her pain…her sleepless nights…things we all despise and dread and hate…and allowed God to turn it inside out and make it something beautiful for Him! He truly has dealt bountifully with all of us!